Take Me Under
by LarcSakurai
Summary: Axel/Roxas, Reno/Rude Three addicts live in a dog-eat-dog world where it is every man for himself. Until Roxas becomes addicted to one of his roommates and all hell breaks loose in a struggle of life and death when Axel's secrets catch up on him
1. Lost and Found

Chapter 1- Lost and Found

Stumbling down the dark alleys scraping bleeding fingers across grimy stone walls. Feet threatened to buckle beneath him but he continued stubbornly forward, tripping over clattering obstructions until he landed face first in the muddy dirt. He shoved the mud off his face as he rose, clawing his way up the bricks in a futile effort to support himself. Breath came shallow and quick, feeling something constrict in his stomach reminding him of starvation. He wasn't sure what to think at this point, unable to grasp a single thred of thought amongst the masses whirling inside his empty head. He reached out for one and tumbled forward again cracking his head against unyielding cement wiping his senses with ripples of white hot pain. Nothing made sense anymore. What was he doing here, where the hell was he to begin with?

Above the moonglow throttled his head with another assault of pain, the dimmest of lights seering what sight remained in his retinas. Slowly he rolled over onto his back, scraping at the loose grains of asphalt dotting the sidewalk as if he were gathering up the pieces of himself he'd scattered. Roxas screamed, clawing viciously at his wrists tearing at his hair, convulsing and bucking, contorting this way and that like he were a rubber snake. Everything hurt so fucking bad he couldn't even begin to imagine waking up from this nightmare. There was no waking up. He was trapped, trapped! He screamed again as darkness engulfed his body and fingertips spouted blood tearing them against invisible walls desperate to find a break in the abyss that would allow for escape.

Strong arms seized his shoudlers roughly pulling him from the throes of the nightmare's grasp and shaking him back to reality. His head lolled limply back and a swift smack burned his cheeks. Roxas moaned weakly, the only sound he could manage. There was no telling what state his beaten little body was in, he wasn't even sure what was going on anymore. Touches checked his vital signs only to find nothing. He was heartless after all. There was nothing to sense, nothing to feel. He wasn't supposed to feel. That's what he was supposed to be anyway.

"--y...-ey! ..ou... kay..?"

"Mnghh..." Roxas couldn't respond, he couldn't barely make out the voice speaking to him. It was male, he could tell that much. He felt himself beginning to fall again. Down, down, down into the darkest of descents. He couldn't will himself to open his eyes, to wake, to live. All he wanted to was succumb to this numbing darkness around him. It would be so much easier that way. To just give up and die, to just forget about it all and lose himself to the darkness.

His nerves shot awake as some sticky substance poured over his face flooding his nose forcing him to his knees to cough and sputter up the foreign substance. It stank like ancient whiskey potent after sitting for some numerous decades. Finally coaxing his eyes open enough to see straight Roxas saw it indeed was a bottle of whiskey clutched in a slender bony hand. He traced thick veins up to fair skin even farther up to slender shoudlers supporting a head crowned with flaming spikes inset with mischievious emerald eyes slightly glazed from inebriation.

"You alive now?" the man asked, reaching down to yank the smaller boy to jelly legs wrapping an arm tight around his waist in attempt to keep him up. The way he stumbled and staggered it was a mircle the man could even hold himself up. Roxas shied from his touch, throwing off the man's grasp only to fall back to the ground again. He could feel his nerves slowly starting to crawl back into his control. The buzzed man leaned against the wall and settled for letting the stubborn ingrate pick himself up despite his efforts to be selfless. Roxas slowly did pick himself up, leaning back against a telephone pole and clinging to it desperatly to keep himself upright.

"T-Thanks.." his tongue felt two sizes too big to fit his mouth and it slid sloppily everytime he tried to speak.

"Sure." the redhead eyed him appreciatively. "Long night?" Roxas felt his face burn indignantly once he finally came to realize what the other was insinuating. The boy's pants were undone and hanging very loosely on his hips aching to expose the boy to the world. The shirt he wore had been torn in several places covered in grime and mud and blood, haphazardly buttoned and his hair had fallen from it's uniform plume to tangle and stick up at odd angles as if he'd just come from a sweaty bedroom.

"I'm no slut." Roxas slurred.

"Nah." the redhead took a long swig from his bottle. "Just a stoner."

"And you're just a drunkard." he countered, "so we're even." To that Roxas expected a furious retort but all the redhead did was shrug and flash a smug, satisfied little grin.

"Yeah, I guess we are. So, kid, you wanna come back to my joint and sober up before you become part of the road?" he jerked a thumb over his shoulder to bright headlights flying down the road. Roxas clenched his eyes against the vicious assault, whispering a meager agreement. It wasn't like he had anywhere else to go.

"And it isn't kid." Roxas snarled, "I do have a name. It's Roxas."

"Axel." the other pressed a finger into Roxas's forehead. "Commit it to memory."

The redhead's apartment, if one wanted to be so gracious enough to call it that, stank of alcohol, tobacco, and rough sex. There was a torn up old couch pushed against one wall in front of an ancient television faintly buzzing as if threatening to implode at any given moment. A claustrophobic kitchen area was to the right of the door and through there was an even more cramped hallway leading to what the blonde boy assumed was a bathroom. Axel kicked his shoes off and left them where they landed, throwing himself down on the couch kicking up a long leg over the side letting the other drape off the side. Roxas couldn't help but flush, the man was flexible.

Axel pointed to the hallway. "The bathroom's in there. Not much to it but it's there. Next to it is the bedroom." here he paused mustering the most elfish grin he could, "hope you don't mind close quarters. I share it with another guy." Roxas didn't want to exactly know what he was implying by that. Seconds later a huge man lumbered out from the tiny hallway, his bald head practically shining with sweat sparkling under the flickering overhead lights. He didn't so much as glance in their direction before taking his leave.

"Who was that?" Roxas ventured that must have been Axel's roommate.

"My roomate's fuck toy." he replied nonchalantly, rising to his feet and throwing off his shirt and pants down to a pair of tattered red boxers. "It's safe to go to bed now." It wasn't a comment, it was a command. Roxas rose and followed the lanky redhead into the other room as best he could. His body had begun to shut down at this point, exhausted beyond the point of breaking. He shuffled into the bedroom and crawled slowly into the messy bed, barely acknowledging the presence of another man already occupying the tight space. All he could see of the man was a scratched up black and a trail of long crimson hair. His sweaty flushed skin rose and fell with the rhythm of deep sleep. It suited Roxas just fine. He wasn't feeling particularly social at this point.

Weight bounced the bed as Axel nestled himself beteween Roxas and whoever the other man was, talking idely to himself ashe drew up the silky blankets and drifted into lazy respite. Roxas slid his eyes shut, laying awake in the darkness of his eyelids unable to coax himself into rest though his body ached. The stench of fresh sex stung his nose, he couldn't imagine what he'd just gotten hismelf into. Anythign was better than that place though.. better than being raped every night. Fixing one addiction in order to recieve another. It had worn him more this time.. he needed it so badly. For tonight all he could do was grace his body with some degree of care and allow himself to willingly sleep. Until the morning rose and the vicious cycle began again.


	2. Birds of a Feather

Chapter 2- Birds of a Feather

_It was easier to forget..._

_"You..."_

_The pain, the betrayal..._

_"You're.. what are you!?"_

_The only one that ever gave a damn..._

_"Don't touch me! You fucking liar I'll kill you myself!"_

_It was all his fault... all his fault... why... why..._

Creak

THUMP

Creak

THUMP

Creak

THUMP!

The relentless ostinato tore Roxas from the depths of his dreams, eyes remaining tightly shut fighting back furious tears threatening to engulf him. His body still hadn't fully regained its senses, the ground beneath him swaying and rocking rhythmically. Noises started flooding his mind as unintelligible mumbles and a chorus of heavy groans wrapped around the senseless sounds finally starting to put them into order. Roxas looked to his right jumping to horrified attention once he grasped the realization his two new roommates would not let this mysterious stranger interrupt any of their fun.

In a mass of tangled limbs and flaming red hair the two redheads lay together covered in thin layers of sweat and blood. Axel's hips rocked fiercly pounding into the slender body beneath him, one of the man's legs tossed over Axel's shoulder. Roxas shuddered with every move Axel made becoming slower and more laborious as the submissive undoubtedly became almost _painfully_ tight. Their faces remained contorted in hot, oblivious bliss, moaning and groaning each other's names tangling bloodcoated nails to yank their hair.

"Oh baby... Oh more yes there!" the thinner of the anorexic pair writhed and squirmed under his dominant, moaning like a cheap whore. Axel didn't seem to pay any heed to how horrendously cheesy it sounded, only that it must have felt so damn good buried inside him. Roxas couldn't find himself the will to tear away from the couple for fear of disturbing their games. He had no idea what he was dealing with yet and as pleasant as death may have sounded he was in no hurry to achieve it just yet.

Axel finally brought the other to climax, sticky white shooting up to splatter on his stomach and chest. Though Roxas found it faintly disgusting it was apparent the redhead found it highly erotic. When the two finally lay sated Roxas dared to sit up, twin pairs of eyes analyzing every inch of the boy's supple skin.

"He's a pretty one.." the submissive slid out from underneath Axel stumbling around in a half assed search for pants. "Where'd you find him?" Axel shrugged, flopping down on his back wiping his torso clean to dine on the sweet substance.

"Damn you taste good." The longer haired man winked back at him, grabbing a brush to haphazardly struggle out the knots until he finally gave up and threw it back in a ponytail.

"That's what they all say." Roxas didn't want to know what he meant by that. Not that he was any cleaner. His senses has already begun to fail, the pain clenching his throat obstructing air with every pitiful gasp. It was coming back again, the withdraw, the horrible recoil, the pain, everything was coming back. He needed it.. craved it, hopelessly addicted to it. It was all his fault.. All his fault!

_"Don't ever come back!"_

Bright blue eyes widened as something pushed into his mouth and he inhaled upon command, soothing sweet nicotine working into his bloodstream and unclenching the wired nerves. He yanked the cheap cigarette from the other's hands and puffed it to naught in a matter of seconds desperate to ease the burn. Axel settled in next to him and lit another offering it out to the boy who smoked that one down in no time flat. He'd seen some nasty chain smokers in his life but nothing beat a desperate stoner. Nicotine would only work for so long but it would have to suffice until he could get a real fix.

"What's your poison?" Axel lit up a cigarette for himself, dark bags faintly underlined the redhead's eyes as he turned to face the newcomer.

"Heroine." Roxas replied slowly, holding his hand out shyly for another hit. Axel took another long drag on the cancer stick before passing it off to Roxas.

"You're gonna kill my last pack kid. We'll hook you up with a good supplier, he sells your shots pretty cheap." Roxas nodded quickly finishing off the cigarette and putting it out. It wouldn't last long but it would suffice for now. Stepping out into the main room dull sunlight filtered in through grungy blinds on the other side of the room, the second redhead sitting over a cup of steaming black coffee twirling strands of hair.

"Roxas." Axel motioned to the other. "That's Reno."

"Yo." he gave a little wave and unfolded the morning paper. He didn't regard Axel as he spoke, "He going to see Xemnas?"

"Yeah probably." Axel got himself a cup of coffee and reclined back at the table. Shyly Roxas slide into a third chair, gripping the table for dear life as one of the legs sagged under his weight.

"Oh, the chair leg's busted by the way." Reno repeated the obvious.

"Yeah, thanks.." Roxas shifted in the chair until he found a good angle to sit at, carefully situating himself to equalize the balance. The addiction still scratched his his throat but it wasn't nearly as bad as before. Reno looked up to a clock on the wall, disappearing back into the bedroom and then into the bathroom. Shards of glass jutted from the edging of the clock and glistened dangerously on the end table declaring testimony one of these men harbored a much darker side within. Not that either of them were truly angels, none of them were. Roxas fit right in with the grungy pair. Sex, drugs, and alcohol all sharing a cramped little hole in the wall. Birds of a feather certainly did flock together.

Axel walked over to the fridge and yanked the door open, lips curling into a foul scowl as whatever he sought wasn't to be found. Muttering choice words he threw the door shut rattling the ancient machine threatening to just collapse over dead. Roxas pressed himself back against the wall, quickly looking back over to where the shattered clock face lay. Trembles of addiction heightened with fear of Axel's wrath, the redhead attracted to the stench like a moth to a flame. His walk swung with predatory sway as he closed in on the small boy, pinning long legs to either side of him to deter any escape. Roxas shoved trying to throw him off only to bring the wild temper down upon him, nails biting into his wrists locking Roxas's arms behind him and pulling. Pain replaced desire, watching the horrible hunger within those emerald depths grow until Roxas feared the redhead would denounce alcohol and dine on his flesh instead.

"You got any cash kid?" His voice was slow and deliberate, daring him to deny.

"Y-Yeah.. a litttle..." he swallowed hard, tears biting his eyes as Axel relinquished his hands.

"Fork it over." he held a palm out, "Consider this your room and board fee, hmm? You scratch my back and I'll take you to see Xemnas." Roxas didn't have much of an option at this point. He dug what little cash remained to his broken name and pushed it into the other's hand watching it disappear into skintight pockets. Axel dismounted him as Reno came out of the back brushing sopping wet hair.

"You going out?" Reno inquired, digging in his pockets for something.

"Yeah, you need another bottle?" Nothing was considered sacred between these two.

"Do I ever. Rude used it all again!" Reno tossed Axel his wallet, reclining back on the couch. "You taking him?"

"Yeah." he pulled on a leather vest and slipped the other's wallet inside. "You gotta start taking it easy on the lube man or you'll be out before you get paid again and then what?"

Reno huffed. "It's not _my_ fault he's huge. You're just jealous."

"Sure." Axel rolled his eyes. "That's what it is. C'mon Roxas." he strolled out the apartment. Roxas hesitated, considering he lived here now he might as well feed himself. He opened up the fridge, grimacing when he saw there truly wasn't much to pick from. Beggars couldn't be choosers, he grabbed an apple and forced the door shut before following Axel out into the bright sunlight.

Now that he was conscious he took in the details of his surroundings, a dilapidated impoverished section of town crawling with who knew what. Obnoxious punks loitered around grungy corner stores brandishing all brands of typically thug weaponry, billy clubs, guns, the classic baseball bat. Those who lived in the name of the law had no place in the Hollow Bastion district, home to scores of degenerates and dropouts. That was life, beating the existance out of the smallest man or fucking the life out of the closest girl in order to make ends meet. Roxas tailed Axel as he stole into the nearby "Whirlwind Whiskey and Liquor" store paying no heed to the sign long worn prohibiting those under 21.

Behind the bar a stocky man glanced up and gave a snort at the pair, reaching beneath the bar without even looking and withdrawing a bottle pushing it across to the approaching redhead. Axel grabbed the bottle and heaved a six pack up onto the counter, money quickly exchanging hands. The man's interest picqued at the sight of Roxas, interested to see a new face hanging around the dingy little store. Upon the wall hung six very long, very sharp lances glinting in the light off bottles casting slivers of rainbow prisms along the cieling.

"He's here to see Xemnas?" his voice rumbled with a strange, warm accent.

"Yeah." Axel opened up a can and chugged the sweet liquid. Sweet addiction washed through unclenching wired neves. Peace eased Axel's face and the goofy smile Roxas had recalled from the night before returned.

"The cab will be around soon. Just wait here." Axel gently tugged Roxas back outside. He offered the other a can but he waved it away, his body refusing to accept any further substitutes. It wanted a fix and wanted it _now._ Roxas slid down against the wall and rubbed at his pounding head trying to hide himself from the brutal light of the sun above. Roxas just wanted to cry. He wanted him back, wanted to be held and coddled again. It had been nearly six months since he'd been reduced to a crack whore, laying on his back and spreading for the first to offer him a quick fix. Anything to be numb again.

"C'mon." Axel tossed the box in the front seat of a cab, climbing in. "This is our ride." Roxas barely felt the plush interior as he slid in, his body convulsing and shaking again. He burst out in shameless tears screaming and crying for the pain to end. He called his name, over and over called for him apologizing and begging to take him back. He lost all sense of where he was, all sense of feeling. Nothing made sense. He had no money for this deal, he would undoubtedly have to take the lord onto him. He almost didn't care anymore. It was just part of the game, an unfortunate side effect of the endless addiction. He'd do anything for another taste. Anything.

Anything to be numb again.


	3. Self Infliction

Reality was a surreal concept to Roxas climbing from the cab to stand before some lounge bathed in neon glow. Colors and lights swirled before his eyes like a bad acid trip reminding his body of deprivation. He moved forward to collapse, strong harms keeping him from going anywhere. His legs were numb as he glided past shadowed, inscrutable faces colliding into a warm, strong wall. Hands groped slipper leather sliding off to claw air as the wall moved out from his grip to reveal another hallway. Mumbles exchanged and Roxas was herded down the hall into deeper darkness then shoved falling down, down, down onto something soft. The sensation of falling lingered, the darkness closing in tighter around him until he was smothered.

It made no sense to try and open his eyes when all there was to see were giant masses of color and indecipherable shapes waddling around. At least darkness was a constant shade, it didn't hurt his head at all. Something touched his arm bending it as if it were rubber. Roxas couldn't tell the difference, it was all a bad dream. A nightmare he lived and breathed every day of his miserable little life.

Then suddenly everything made sense again and he wasn't falling but floating. Walking on hot, sweet air as addictivbe warmth soothed his aching body and blanked the concept of sense from his mind. He giggled, wrapping his arms around the cuddly warmth and snuggling it close. How good it felt to feel again. A jolt hit his arm and the warmth returned tenfold knocking the nobody delirious with glee. He reached out to embrace another wave but it never came, beautiful dementia ebbing away into the cruelties of reality. When he opened his eyes he realized the room wasn't his, wasn't Axel's. Sometime during the dream he'd been transported into a small room and laid on a bed. His right arm had been tied off and a cottonball taped to the skin. Beside him a blue haired man undid the tie and regarded the boy with a greatly unamused scowl.

"Good, you're awake." he shoved the tie and syringe into a black bag at his feet. Roxas gaved a little not.

"Yeah..." Roxas paused to regain himself from the trip. He could only surmise he was wherever Axel had planned for them to go. "Where am I?"

"Black Twilight cocktail lounge." he replied curtly, hoisting the bag on his shoulder.

"W-Wait!" Roxas rubbed his eyes stringing the sentence together in his head. "W-What's gonna happen? Why am I here? And who are you?"

"Saix. As for what will happen to you that is up to Xemnas. You won't be seeing him tonight, however. He's in a very... heated.. discussion." The look in those amber eyes gave an alternative definition to 'heated' Roxas didn't want to think about. Roxas couldn't recall anything, fuzzy images of the liquor store and then a bright yellow cab.. a voice.. a voice was talking to him.. "Axel?"

"Axel is in the lounge. But my orders were very strict and that was to keep you in here until tomorrow once you have been properly fixed and have had time to recooperate." Saix took out a cigarette and puffed on it, watching Roxas slide back on the bed defeated. His options were pretty much nil at this point. This room had become his temporary confinement until the mystical being named Xemnas decided his fate. Well Roxas wasn't one to wait for destiny.

He waited until Saix was gone before slipping over to the door. He waited until a heavy door slammed shut in the distance before slipping open his door and creeping out into darkness. The only source of light a soft red glow over his head casting an eerie glow over the passage. It reminded Roxas of those cheesy horror flicks they would go see after school on Saturdays. His chest gave a painful twist. No, he pushed the thought of Hayner from his mind. This was no time to get distracted. Anything could leap out and devour him from the shadows, or at least he hoped nothing would.

Slinking along the wall Roxas continued down the creepy old hallway, looking around the corner. Black. Dark black... and a presence. A dark, ominous presence. Something, or someone, was waiting in those shadows. He could barely see the outline of a door at the end of the passage. So close... he was so close... his blood pounded in his ears as he tried to muster the courage to make a mad dash down the last few feet. He could be out of here and into who knows where but maybe Axel would be there. Axel would know what to do.

His feet couldn't carry him any faster as he broke through the darkness, nails clawing viciously at the heavy iron door at the end. He could find no latch, no handle. There was no way out, he couldn't see in this damned darkness. The presence looming shifted, heavy arms shoving the boy into the wall and then up off his feet. He was slung over a shoulder, kicking and screaming as he was escorted back to his room and thrown in. He stumbled, colliding with a desk on the other side staring up into steely grey eyes. The man was a giant, hard and cold as if he'd been craved straight from a slab of marble. Broad and bulky with muscle and well over six feet of height he maintained a gentlemanly class. Roxas gave him talent for that considering he'd just flung the boy across the room like some old ragdoll.

Before Roxas could speak again the giant slung the door shut with a deafening thud. That was it. End of discussion, he was trapped here until Xemnas felt so generously inclined to release him. He wanted to just curl up and cry, nothing made sense anymore. Dragging across the room he slid up onto the bed and broke down crying. He wanted to be back in Hayner's arms being pet and loved and showered with the deepest of affections. To be touched and kissed and pet and cuddled. Wanted to be told he was the most beautiful thing in the world and they were one, body, heart, and soul.

_"What the fuck is wrong with you!?"_

Heart..

_"A-A what?!"_

He wanted a heart...

_"You're disgusting.. Don't touch me!"_

Or.. maybe it was easier this way...

_"Don't ever come back! I hate you!"_

This way...

_"No one will miss me.."_

He didn't ever have to love again.


	4. Dr Feelgood

Chapter 4- Dr. Feelgood

"You have been working yourself a nice debt, Axel." Saix grumbled, throwing his bag down. Smoke danced off his cigarette twirling intricate shapes upward only to fade into thin air. Much like his life, the redhead mused. Spending his days thrashing and dancing along to the tune of sweet addiction only to fade into nothing like he never existed in the first place. All that he'd ever known had amounted to nothing. He would die a nobody and the world would continue on like his existence was just a product of cruel imagination.

"So I've been told. Xemnas will get his money." Saix rolled his eyes.

"And come out of your roomate's pocket?"

Axel's eyes narrowed. "Does it matter as long as you get it?"

"We don't like the Shinra." Saix replied curtly, "And I'd rather not risk having our operation exposed because of them. Or rely on a Turk for anything." He pulled a pistol from his coat pocket, lazily stroking the cold steel. He'd sooner shoot Axel and be done with this little problem than have to continue dealing with any association from Shinra. Axel tossed down a wad of cash and pulled a bottle of dark liquor from a nearby crate eyeing the bottle appreciatively. Red Nibel Vodka, a rare catch indeed.

"Get over it." Axel's brazen disregard for authority made Saix seriously consider pumping the bastard full of lead but Xemnas wouldn't approve of blood all over the carpets.

"That shot for your little fucktoy is going to cost you another payment."

"Whatever man." Axel took the bottle and pushed by Saix, heading into the room of the most powerful drug lord known to the region. Xemnas sat in all his glory behind a desk in a spacious office, a statuesque giant of a man at his side quietly rubbing his fingers over the handle of some weird looking hammer. Xemnas looked up at Axel as he entered wearing a highly unamused frown. Of any man that had to frequent his empire the most it was him.

"I see empty hands, Axel." Xemnas's patience was dangerously thin. "You better have brought something or you won't be living this room in one piece."

"Easy there, " Axel threw down another wad of cash he'd managed to snatch from Reno's wallet. Enough to keep Xemnas at bay for now. "You'll get the rest." Xemnas pocketed the money and snapped his fingers, the giant bodyguard stepping out from the shadows to tower over the redhead.

"I warned you. This is barely enough to scratch at what you owe me.." Xemnas leaned up on the desk formulating various ways he could torture Axel into submission. "And I'm not willing to wait anymore."

"Wait!" Axel shrieked as his body collided hard with the wall knocking him breathless. Lexaeus seized a fistful of spikes and tugged the degenerate to his feet, throwing a punishing blow to the gut. Axel crumpled at his feet gasping and whimpering for air, pain seering his vision. Everything was a painful blanket of white and the guard was already pulling him back onto his feet for another smackdown.

"Lexaeus." Xemnas waved for the giant to release his toy and he did, throwing the body to the floor. Xemnas knelt down next to the knave, jerking his chin upward demanding his undivided attention.

"And how do you suggest paying me back?" Xemnas couldn't wait to hear what creative little lie he'd concocted this time.

"T-There's that kid.." Axel whimpered softly. If he didn't do something he wasn't getting out of here alive.

"You truly are a dirty bastard." Xemnas laughed as he rose to his feet. "The young boy's body for your life? You're a clever little son of a bitch aren't you, Axel?"

"I ain't got no money.." Axel forced himself upright. "It's all I can offer you since you like 'em younger anyway." Xemnas was quite a casanova with two male whores forever hanging on his arms, a blonde and a blue-haired bookworm. Xemnas considered Axel's plea greatly amused by how desperate this man was to save his own ass. That he'd offer up the body of a sixteen year old boy as payment.

Perhaps it was moreso curiosity that led Xemnas to accept Axel's offer. Boredom with fucking the same two every night, wanting some new risk to the game. Another flavor to sample. He could easily have had that slutty Turk but no amount of candy cane in the world could make him easy enough to sleep with anything Shinra had already claimed. Axel was released to go get his little companion and Lexaeus dismissed to go play with his pretty little blonde.

Xemnas had to admit the scared little boy that entered his office was by no means unattractive. It was his eyes that attracted the lord the most, the simple defiance in those oceanic depths promised a wild ride. He liked them fiesty. Rising to brush the boy's cheek he could tell the child was no stranger to the life of a crack whore either, obediently stripping and pressing up against the taller man in all the right places. Xemnas's eyes fluttered determined to enjoy this. No doubt Axel had lied to the child but that was the life they lived. Powder for pleasure. He escorted Roxas behind his desk into the next room, throwing him down on the bed. He admired the body of the young boy kneeling before him, small hands deftly dealing away with restraining buttons. He'd been touched, Xemnas could see scars and scratches as testimonies of various adventures he had known. The boy was no stranger to the heat of a hungry bed.

What enraptured Xemnas about Roxas was that despite living the life of a crack whore he did not come off as easy. His actions were quick and sharp, knowing exactly how to stroke and massage the lord's body to make him moan. Roxas was vocal enough once Xemnas warmed him up but he wasn't cheap. Soft, needy groans, tiny whimpers. Completely natural and it made his blood rush southward. Pinning back Roxas he feathered wet kisses along the supple throat, nipping at old marks from fantasies past. He did not favor taking a night in bed for payment but in these circumstances Xemnas was willing to make an exception. Roxas threw back his head gritting teeth hard against pain as Xemnas took him. Roxas rolled his hips down into hard, punishing thrusts threatening to tear him in half. He'd slept with plenty of drug lords in his time but Xemnas was brutal. He paid no heed to the tiny, pained whimpers that left him and Roxas knew it was foolish to ever utter a plea for gentleness. The best he could do was ride it out and prayed the storm came to a climax soon.

Long nails sank into his shoulders and in spite of himself Roxas moaned, starting to lose himself to the release boiling deep in his belly. Hot, tight knots burning that familiar, blissful heat. Xemnas pinned Roxas's wrists over his head, slamming down into the smaller body until both finally screamed with the bliss of climax. Plummeting down they fell back on the bed unable to find the will to move. Roxas winced at the cold reception in the lord's amber depths. Disgust... Amusement... How humiliating...

"_Come with me and I can assure your happiness."_

Hah.. that was a lie... They made him a crack whore... selling his soul for five minutes of acid..

_"That's a good boy.."_

Roxas got up and dressed, suddenly self-consious and very aware of the deed he'd just committed. He wanted to run and hide, melt into the floor and disappear. How disgusting he was.. dirty, tainted... He was so wrong.. He hated the feeling of being inside this tingling skin. He had nowhere to go, no one to turn to... This was his life...

"Axel..." he finally managed the gasp, "I want Axel.."

Amused, Xemnas led the boy out of his bedchamber back into the main lobby of the hideaway. Axel lay cradled contently against a plush blue loveseat chugging down a bottle of some kind of alcohol. He didn't care.. Axel was equated with safety, security, a friend. As much of a friend as one could have in a world like theirs. Axel's eyes flickered with dim recognition when Roxas approached and hugged him, pleading to be taken back home. Tossing aside the now empty bottle the redhead staggered to his feet and out the door back to their sanctuary.

Reno hadn't returned from work so the house was still dark. Roxas stepped inside and guided the drunken Axel over to the couch where he could enjoy his bliss. Roxas stroked the extra shot he'd been given while waiting to meet with Xemnas, desperate enough to take it if it meant he didn't have to feel this wrenching disgust. He locked himself in the bedroom and buried his face in raunchy sheets, not caring who or what had slept here. He just wanted to die.. to disappear, to be numb again.

The shot hit his arm knocking him delirious. Fire flew up his nose gagging him, the rush devouring every inch of his veins. Hot tears burst from his eyes and he screamed, louder and louder until his throat were hoarse. Even louder after that, contorting and thrashing on the bed like a snake. He begged and pleaded to the darkness to take him far away from here, back to Hayner's arms where he was warm and safe and everything made sense again. Away from dementia and suffering and addiction. Away from Axel and Reno and Xemnas. Far, far away back where he belonged. Back here, in the darkness coming to swallow him up, wrapping his mind and pulling him down, down, down into oblivion until there was no need for words and thoughts.

The eternal santuary of sleep...

_Take me under_

_Take me under_

_Feeling the needles_

_Breaking my skin_

_Rush of sweet poison_

_Through my cold veins_

_Sucking the life_

_From my last breath_

_You know you'll crave it_

_Ache it, need it_

_You know you'll scream and cry_

_Begging to die_

_Until you savor all your addictions_

_And lose resolve to fall back into dark_

_Take me under_


	5. Ticket to Heaven

Chapter 5- Ticket to Heaven

Reno finally stumbled into the apartment hours into the wee morning exhausted and weak. Ths night's mission had drained him and he couldn't wait to crawl into bed and sleep himself to death. They expected him back bright and early but they would have to shove it, he needed to sleep. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out his last cigarette, looking about for his wallet. He'd have to hit the Whirlwind again before he went into work. A dark, angry scowl crossed his face as he found his wallet empty. Again. Who the fuck was he working for? He agreed to pay the rent, not Axel's fucking habit!

That was IT!

He stalked over to where the sleeping Axel lay, shaking the drunkard hard. He let out a groan of misery, eyes slowly sliding open. Reno took his cigarette and pressed it into Axel's arm. That woke him up right quick.

"ASSHOLE!" Axel shoved Reno backward, still woozy on his feet. "What the fuck?!"

"YOU LAZY SON OF A BITCH!" Reno threw the nearest cup he could find at the other redhead, watching it shatter all over the floor. "Why don't you try living for yourself for once rather than living off me all the fucking time?!" He was exhausted.. he didn't need this.. his nerves were on fire and Axel was pushing all the wrong buttons. He was beyond sick of supporting Axel and his bad habit.. it hadn't been so bad at first but now all they did was fight. All Axel ever used him for was a bank. He was through playing mommy to the drunk and his ignorance.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!" Axel quickly advanced on the Turk, a dance for life and death manuevering the Turk back into a corner. Reno's breath came faster, Turk instincts kicking in ready to tear the other apart of he didn't stop. He was pushing all the wrong buttons in a body wired for survival before morals. The two redheads stood toe to toe, electricity cracking between them. Reno could feel his chest tighten, fists clenched, ready to pounce if Axel moved one step closer.

"I'M FUCKING SICK OF SUPPORTING YOUR BAD HABITS! YOU'RE A LAZY MOTHERFUCKER WITH YOUR HEAD TOO FAR UP YOUR OWN ASS TO SEE HOW STUPID YOU ARE! I'M NOT SUPPORTING YOUR HABIT ANYMORE, AXEL!" Blood spurted out Reno's nose as Axel's fist cracked into it sending him reeling back into the wall. Roars tore from Reno as he lunged at Axel, all the survival instincts he'd ever learned flaring up to guard him from the bastard's fists. Fists and feet connected with senstive places, nails tore at eyes and mouths spurting fresh blood from wounds.

Alcohol was a powerful force, a force far stronger than Reno expected. Axel's head whipped up into his knocking Reno dizzy. Taking advantage of the moment Axel flipped them over and quickly straddled Reno, wrapping strong hands around his throat. Reno paniced, kicking and screaming against the hands clawing desperately. His lungs burned, everything swimming in his visions gagging and choking on pitiful whimpers for air. Exhaustion swept back in and he struggled against his own body desperate to shut down. He only had one more chance..

Reaching out he grabbed the door of a nearby cabinet, slamming it open and shut in futile attempt to rouse the sleeping boy in the other room. Just his luck the kid had shot up before he passed out. Good luck waking him up then. Thinking became harder, grasping at any stray thought trickling by. He had to get out of here.. had to get away.. he could hear the whispers of the planet beckoning their broken child back into its arms.. No.. No he didn't wanna die!

"STOP IT!" Hands pulled away and air rushed his lungs setting them ablaze. Coughing hard he gripped the pistol at his thigh, pointing it up at Axel in case he got anymore bright ideas. Axel was on his knees now staring at his hands in disbelief, blood trickling down the sid eof his face. Roxas stood behind him wielding a plunger the Turk surmised he'd beaten the other with. Lowering the pistol he slumped to the cold floor, the cool tiles almost refreshing against his warm skin. Weariness seeped back into his muscles unclenching the nerves. Pacified, he watched his roomates, Axel getting to his feet to storm back into the bedroom.

Tears rollled down Roxas's cheeks. Tears.. the poor kid must have been terrified. It was one hell of a life to lead and Reno could only imagine the pain of addiction and whatever had brought him to such a measure. He barely looked a day over sixteen.. no kid deserved to live like this. Holstering the gun he managed back to his feet, reaching out to pull Roxas close against him. The boy struggled vainly before collapsing into the Turk's arms into helpless tears.

"Reno.. oh God Reno what have I done.. look at me.." Roxas whimpered, clinging tightly to the bloody man. "He.. he hates me Reno.. I'm so disgusting..."

"Who hates you Roxas?" Reno gently guided them over to the couch pulling the boy into his arms to lament.

"Hayner.." he whispered softly. "My.. my boyfriend.. or.. he was..."

"Mind me asking why?" Reno threaded his fingers through Roxas's hair, hearing the soft creak of the floorboards telling of Axel's presence in the threshold. Eavesdropping, no doubt.

"No.. I don't..." Roxas sat back withdrawing from his pocket a keychain of what looked like a throwing star. He bit his lip, fighting tears as the memories threatened to break him again. He had to get over Hayner.. he couldn't.. he couldn't let it swallow him again. "We were friends since we were little.. and we just gradually became more and more until we were lovers... Then.."

"Then?" Reno asked gently.

"...he found out.. I had no heart. We were just sitting there on the couch and he wanted to.. h-have sex.. I knew he was going to find out about my heart if he did.. It was hard to hide it before but I managed somehow.." Tears bubbled out of his eyes frustrating him. He.. he didn't want to cry over this but it hurt so damn much.. It was all Hayner's fault.. everything...

Reno frowned. Axel didn't have a heart either so he was used to the notion himself but that must have been shocking news for a kid. "I guess he didn't take the news too well..?"

_"WHAT KIND OF... OF FREAKSHOW ARE YOU?!"_

"No.." Roxas held tighter. "He didn't.. He called me so many names.. pushed me.. told me I was disgusting and demented... Only minutes after telling me I was beautiful and he'd always love me!" Nails sank into his wrists, Reno holding his hands back to prevent self-destruction. "I never asked to be born like this!"

"Shh.. easy.. easy.." He gently nuzzled the other's hair. "Easy kid..."

"It's all his fault Reno! It's all his fault! I just.. I wanted to try so I didn't have to think and I got hooked and.. and eventually I ran out of money so.." He was hysterical by now, hiccuping and coughing between fits of tears.

"It's alright Roxas." he held the ecstatic boy close against him wishing he could do something.. but there was only one method of comfort he knew.

"I don't wanna feel anymore... I don't.. I'm so sick of this shit.." He was so tired.. everything hurt... Reno was so warm and safe against him he could drown in it. Reaching up he pulled the Turk down on top of him and closed his eyes, silently begging to be freed from this horrible, horrible pain. Reno leaned in and kissed his neck showering Roxas in the only affection he knew. Axel turned and strode back down the hall, staring out the window at the moonshine above. He withdrew a hidden bottle of vodka and chugged it, as fast as he could. He didn't care.. it felt so damn right, so damn good... He would do whatever it took to not have to feel anymore... to be void of all emotion.... to escape this horrible pain inside.

Anything to be numb again...

Ealry morning and he couldn't sleep. It couldn't have been more than maybe three in the morning. Reno was still blissfully asleep and he vaguely found himself wondering how Axel was. Slipping out from under the Turk he rummaged around for his pants and went to the back bedroom. The door was slightly ajar and he could hear moans of pain from inside, no doubt a hangover. Stepping into the room Axel lay passed out across the bed hiding his face in the dark sheets trying to escape. He looked like shit and he could only imagine how he must have looked himself.

Crossing the room Roxas shut the blinds and slid up onto the bed watching him. They were truly more alike then one would think. Suffering alone with these addictions, desperate to make something of themselves in a life full of nothing with no way at all to repent for their countless wrongs. In the short span he'd known the man he had started growing attached to him. Not love, no, nothing that deep. He'd never love again after Hayner. He did care for Axel though, and was concerned for him.

"Morning.." Axel looked up at him, flashing a weak smile. Hangovers were the worst..

"Hey..." he closed his eyes and hid back against the blankets. "What do you want?" Axel had expected to be hounded, yelled at. Most definately not have the smaller boy's hand lace fingers with his, pulling it close to his silent chest. A million emotions whirled in Axel's head, watching Roxas take each finger and kiss it softly. Was he just desperate or that damn stupid?

"Axel.." His voice was genuine. Hurting so badly. "I.. want to come clean.. Please..." He held the hand tighter. "Come with me.. fight with me.. don't leave me alone Axel, I don't want to be alone anymore!"

"Roxas..." he wasn't sure how to take this boy's plea.. Clean. He'd entertained that muse several times himself but he'd never been able to do it on his own. Maybe.. together... "Do you.. think we could do this together? Come clean?"

"Yes.." Roxas nodded firmly. "We have the determination.. and if we get lost we'll have each other.. I think we can do this Axel." He kissed the hand again, laying down next to his companion. "Together. Maybe even with Reno..."

It was a long shot. An uncertain path. A chance to right all his wrongs.

Something must have been watching out for him.

"Alright babe.." he took Roxas's hand and kissed it in return, the silent agreement binding them together on a new, perilous journey. "We'll do this together..."

_Take me under_

_Take me under_

_Feeling the needles_

_Breaking my skin_

_Rush of sweet poison_

_Through my cold veins_

_Sucking the life_

_From my last breath_

_You know you'll crave it_

_Ache it, need it_

_You know you'll scream and cry_

_Begging to die_

_Until you savor all your addictions_

_And lose resolve to fall back into dark_

_Take me under_


	6. Alive

Chapter 6- Awake

Excitement the previous evening had drained Roxas so he wasn't surprised to wake to a digital face blinking 11:45. It were only he and Axel curled up in bed, Reno hadn't come in last night. Probably still pissed off at Axel. Beside him the accused dozed in peace, strong chest rising and falling in slow, deep breath. Gentle as he looked now it was difficult to visualize the demon Roxas had witnessed yesterday. Roxas reached out to tease the flaming tresses, carressing the soft spikes. Axel shifted up into the hand and Roxas smiled. He was such a beautiful man and Roxas knew he had a good soul, just misguided. Axel had it in him to come clean. That determination in his eyes last night had been genuine and if anyone in this world could stop on a dime it was Axel. It wasn't going to be easy, Roxas was certain of that.

Abandoning Axel's warmth Roxas made himself decent and ventured into the kitchen in search of coffee. Reno snored gently on the couch across the room, crimson hair spilling over the arm. Atop him was the cueball Roxas had remembered seeing coming from the bedroom his first night here, probably here to comfort Reno after the war. Exploring the cupboards revealed several containers of various roasts barely enough for sustenance. Feeling prickly, the blonde dumped several of the roasts together into the pot and kicked back to await the finish product. He looked down at the track marks racing the length of his arm and he winced. Damn he'd let himself get bad.

Someone shuffled in the other room and Roxas watched Reno's fucktoy, as Axel so graciously called him, come into the kitchen and plant himself firmly in front of the pot. He eyed the conglomeration of containers with amusement, sitting back against the counter. He was a broadly built man with blue eyes of a humble soul. Definately wouldn't have struck Roxas as the type to associate with Reno. Here he was though, sitting across from a sixteen year old crack whore waiting on a precarious brew of coffee in some little apartment stagnant with the smell of sex and booze.

"Hi..." Roxas croaked, trying his best to be hospitable though his throat stung and cracked. It was awkward as hell just staring at each other. The man nodded in return. Not one for sparkling conversation apparently. Roxas turned on the sink water, sipping it to ease the burn in his throat. It tasted like shit but got the job done.

"What's your name?"

"Rude." he replied, "Reno's partner."

"Oh..." the coffee was almost ready. "Are you a Turk?" The man was built like a tank.. that's a stupid question.

Rude nodded. "Yourself?" He got them a mug from above, flaunting strong muscles. He got an extra cup down for Reno, but only three.

"Roxas...Axel's friend." Not too far off...

"I see." Rude made coffee in each cup passing one to Roxas. "What's your poison?"

"Heroin." Just the sound of that word made his stomach curdle. He must have looked horrible if Rude could tell so easily, he hadn't seen himself in ages. It was too terrifying, too horrible, too humiliating to think about. What he was doing to himself. What he'd done. What he was admitting to. Withering to death at the mercy of hellish angel dust. How long had it been since he'd seen the body he lived in every day of his miserable little life? A week? Three weeks? Two months? Did it even matter anymore? How long.. how long had this been going on? He couldn't even recollect when the beginning started. As if it had always been this way.

"I'm going to get Axel!" Roxas declared spontaneously, leaping down from the counter. He abandoned Rude and stepped into the bathroom forcing the stubborn door closed behind him. He approached the mirror slowly, watching his feet. A lump caught in his throat. He couldn't.. he couldn't look. Couldn't bear to think of what he had become. The hideous face that would greet him. The face of something that was him yet not. Nails dug into flesh drawing sticky blood. He.. he had to look...

The sight that greeted him was the face of a specter. Young skin stained pale blotched around the eyes black and blue. Shallow cheeks made him look far older than sixteen. Tears blurred the monster's face, it wrinkled up and looked so ugly as it burst out into wild sobs. Gnawing, hungry pain returned, chewing his nerves down to the wire and he immediately craved oblivion. No.. no he couldn't let it control him! He fell to the floor thrashign and screaming, clawing at mold between linoleum tiles. Electricity cracked through his head as he screamed again reaching desperately towards the light above. The light slurred and darkened as his eyes finally succumbed to the desire to fall. How he would love to go to sleep and escape this pain forever.

Something touched his shoulder shaking him forcefully. He barely registered the feeling of arms wrapping around him and pulling him against something warm and sturday. Roxas tried to speak but could only must whimpers. It hurt like hell to accomplish that much. Pain.. he could feel pain so he must still be alive. A voice called out, steadily mumbling away to him. Fuzzy hands rubbed his cheek slowly growing skin as he drifted back into consiousness.

"Roxas.." he could make out the voice now... Axel?

"Ax...?" Arms held him upright tipping forward the blonde's head. He leaned down and smiled. Axel.. he had a really nice smile.

"Hey you.." he whipred seat from the boy's brow. "You alive?"

"I'm breathing.." he mumbled. He must have still been alive, he could feel the pain radiating around him. Axel's hands soft and warm against his skin. Tender radiance of the redhead's smile above lighting the path along this dark road they traveled. Once he could move Roxas moved to straddle Axel's lap, wrapping his arms tight around the skinny frame sobbing pitifully. Axel was so good to him, patiently stroking his back letting him lament and mourn the animal he'd become. Their world was slowly crashing down around them but they could change that.. They would rise above the opposition and come clean together in sanctity. They would live in peace away from drugs and booze, they could become addicted to each other and the redhot fire they would share together in bed every night. Making sweet, hot love pulling the redhead's hair screaming his name to the moonshine. After suffering for so long they deserved some rest.

"Coffee ready?" Axel could smell it and he definately needed some brew to fight his own growing need.

"Should be.." Roxas closed his mouth over Axel's, the redhead immediately dominating the kiss crushing their mouths together. Slick tongues battled for dominance, sweeping and tasting the craving. Hotter than any fix. Sweeter than any wine. Greedy and lusty and oh so wonderful. Something inside Roxas's head exploded as that tongue moved in his mouth and he cried for it again. Axel broke away from him, the two panting hard staring into dazed depths. Twin smirks met in another hot kiss, this one longer and hotter than before. They didn't need anything else.. Roxas could easily get hooked on this mouth running down his throat, sucking the life from his chest down his stomach and lower. Explosions rocked his head as he was seized inside that mouth, screaming and moaning and crying for more.

Higher and higher he rose on that bathroom floor, the tiles bitter cool against heated, sweaty skin. He couldn't see, everything was a massive blur of pleasure. He didn't want to ever leave these feelings behind, Axel's tongue working him over in ways he never kew existed. He cried out when they mouth left to be pulled against Axel's now naked body, the whimpers and moans of need becoming howls and screams. He closed their mouths together and they bounced feverishly together, craving that edge, that sweet release, blanking away the pain and addiction from their minds. This was the only drug they needed. Each other and that wonderful thick heat slamming deep inside his tight body. They were alive again coated in each other's sticky desire, tasting his own salty seed on his tongue.

Axel held him close as they succumbed to afterglow curling up together on the cool floor. Neither spoke, their mouths dancing together spoke more words than there would ever be meaning for. No language could capture the mass of emotions that lingered in that kiss. More than Roxas knew existed. More than Axel cared to know. It didn't matter, nothing mattered... Nothing. They would come clean and they would know this every night.. Roxas slid off of Axel, coaxing himself to shaking legs to dress once more. He'd have to get another cup of coffee by now.. he wondered how it tasted. Axel took him by the ass and nudged him towards the door.

They emerged from the hall to find Reno wrapped in a coat held tight in Rude's arms. If looks could kill Axel would have been slaughetered by the intense hate boiling in Rude's eyes. The Turk wsa fiercly protective of his partner and didn't like Axel as it was. This wasn't the first time he'd assaulted Reno and that venomous glare belied Rude's truest desire to make it his last. Reno reached up to cup the cueball's face and kissed him passionately trying to deistract him from the other redhead before he did something violent. Rude kissed back quickly, never taking his eyes off Reno as the other went for coffee.

"I should be getting to work, partner.." Reno whispered gently, kissing the thick neck. "Tseng's gonna get pissed if I'm late again." Rude grunted in disapproval but released his friend to get dressed. He straightened himself up getting dressed and straightening his tie pulling on the trademark glasses. Reno came over and gently laced their fingers, basking in the softness his his lover's mouth once more before he headed out the door. Roxas couldn't help but smile, the two redheads exchanging a smile of apology before they left. Maybe things wouldn't be so bad after all.

"I'm going to go get the paper Ax. I'll be back." Roxas pulled a shirt on and headed out. Rude fell into step beside Roxas, the two winding their way down the stairs and outside. Rude sat down on the stoop, pulling a book out of his suit pocket to read. Roxas picked up the paper and leaned in to see what Rude was reading.

"Just a crime novel." he replied simply. "Waiting for Reno to come home. I don't go in today." Roxas smiled, such devotion was kind of adorable. He wondered if Axel would ever wait on him like that.

"You really love him, don't you?" Roxas sat down on the stairs next to the bald man. Rude clapped his book shut and sighed, nodding.

"I love him very much. I want to help him overcome his addiction but it's difficult when it's such a vital part of a relationship. I've learned to live with it." Something glinted in those darkn eyes, something that made Roxas instantly guilty. The same look Hayner had in his eyes.. the night he found out Roxas had no heart. Desperation.. confusion.. a cry for help. yet Rude took it far better rather than blowing up like Hayner had.

"I understand.." Roxas nodded. "Yeah.. I think I do."

"Do you love Axel?"

That was the big question. Did he love Axel? Or was this just desperation? Was this just his cry for help? he wasn't sure.. he didn't know either way. He did certainly care for the redhead, enough to want to help him end his alcoholic habits but.. Dammit, Roxas didn't know... Was he really falling in love all over again?

A low rumble down the road caught their attention, Rude rising when a long black car pulled up in front of the complex. He drew the pistol at his hip but not before the shot of a machien gun rang out through the car's window. Roxas dove for the ground, screaming when Rude's bloody body collapsed to the ground next to him. Oh god.. what he fuck was going on?! He scrambled to his feet and ducked inside, screaming as more shots rang out. Behind him the passenger door opened and out stepped none other than the proud don of the slums himself.

Xemnas.


	7. Take Me Under

Chapter 7- Take Me Under

"I warned him." Xemnas purred, "I'm not willing to wait anymore. Axel's becoming an inconvienience and I'm going to just nip this little problem in the bud before it can blossom into anything even more troublesome." Xemnas leaned down to take a drag from a cigar offered by Saïx from the front seat. On the stoop Rude's body still gushed blood, the Turk moaning in pain. By now the streets were empty, people knew better than to hang around when Xemnas was near. Xemnas slowly strode up the steps, holding his hand out to Roxas smirking all the while.

"Come now boy.. it isn't you I want." he purred, "Give me the redhead and it'll all be over." Roxas backed for the stairs shaking. Above he heard hurried footsteps.. Don't let it be Axel, he pleaded with whatever above would listen to him. Don't let it be Axel! Xemnas continued his advance, lowering his hand to raise up the rifle when he saw Roxas would not be swayed. The blonde continued his advance up the stairs. It was now or never...

An explosion and pain shot through his arm. Electricity shot through his nevres as he broke into a run up the stairs, Xemnas and Saix close behind him. He couldn't let them get Axel.. No.. No he wouldn't let it end this way. A body collided with him and they both fell to the floor, the redhead looking absolutely bewildered. The steps were coming clsoer. Roxas grabbed Axel's hand and bolted for the fire escape, leaping through the window as more shots rang out behind them. Axel asked no questions, dragging Roxas down the escape dodging shots. He threw the smaller body down the next staircase, reaching up to trip Xemnas as he came down another flight. His knuckles hit the rail hard as the lord collided with the wrought iron floor. Axel leaped over the rail narrowly escaping Saix's shots, dragging his companion at the bottom to a motorcycle parked in a nearby deck.

They mounted and the bike roared to life, Axel flying down the road with Roxas tight on his back. They had to get as far as they could before Xemnas and Saix could catch up. Roxas's breath pounded in his head, burying his face in Axel's neck unable to repress terrified tears. They weaved dangerously in and out of traffic, Axel trying to lose their pursuers in the tangle of backroads. It would only postpone the inevitable, Xemnas has held sway over this area for years.

"Where do we go?!" Roxas screamed over the roaring wind, crying out in terror as they nearly collided with a pickup truck. Axel offered no desintation, only gunned the engine harder. Behind them shots rang out and Roxas screamed again. he clung tighter to Axel's body, grabbing a pistol off the redhead's hips and firing back at the lords. His shots nearly knocked him off the bike so he decided it was bet to just hold on and pray Axel knew where he was going. Looking up the form of the Shinra building loomed ever closer. What the hell was Axel going to Shinra for?

It wsa the only place he knew. The only place he could think of where he might be able to hide. his brother was here, the Turks were here, all of Shinra was here. The lords would be stopped or slaughtered the minute they broke through the doors with any luck. Axel drove the motorbike for all it was worth, adrenaline wiring him tight the closer they got. Closer they pushed, narrowly avoiding crash after collision until the neon mako glow shone down on them. he slammed on the brakes so hard they flew off, clattering to the ground with cgroans of pain. Stubbornly the redhead pushed forward, grabbing Roxas's hand and pulling him through the doors.

People screamed and cuked for cover as bullets rang through the office shattering glass and displays all around the building. Red alarms blared all over, the place would be swarmed with Turks and foot soldiers in minutes but it would take alot more than that to stop the greatest drug lord in the region. Axel dived for the elevator, waving his pistol around to clear the space of any employees trapped inside. They scattered for their lives and the heavy doors slid shut just as Xemnas and Saix reached the lobby. The machine began to ascend and Axel slunk back against the wall, watching the ciy through the glass case below. He slid down to the floor, heaving and panting. The race was far from over.

"Roxas.." Axel looked at Roxas, shaking his head. "Why.. are you doing this..?"

"This fight is ours." he replied simply. He knew Xemnas would be after him for those shots and he had no money. It isn't like it would end there.. the cycle would continue to haunt him for the rest of his days. He.. he couldn't justify living his life without the redhead. Fighting for their sanities, their lives together, they had become very close. Axel was.. his best friend.. if not more.. he wasn't about to let him go down alone.

They burst out as the doors open, pushing through the crowds of people. Axel grabbed his pistol waving it around to clear out the hallways. He thursted his pistol to thr throat of the company President picking his pokcets of the master cardkey and bolting up the stairs with Roxas. Roxas stared at the redhead incredulously. He had alot of guts to pickpocket the most powerful man in the nation but to point a gun to his face while doing it? Axel was seriously fucking stupid. Within no time at all even Rufus was on their tail, following right behind all the open doors waving his shotgun up at them.

"GOOD IDEA AXEL!" Roxas screeched, dodging the President's shots. They broke tthrough the doors of the sixty-ninth floor office and started up the stairs towards Rufus;s chamber, the reigger happy President right on their tail. Not far below Roxas could hear Xemnas and Saix. This was fucking wonderful, where were they going to go now?! Axel tugged him outside into the coolr night, running to the edge of the building.

Cold air rushed around them, Shinra soldiers and their beloved President lining up set to fire on the two addicts. Not far below they knew Xemnas and Saix were close by. Just waiting for them to come down. Roxas held close to Axel, burying his face in the redhead's chest inhaling the bittersweet stench of booze still clinging to him. Axel watched as Rufus lowered his weapon, stepping forward to negotiate with the fearful companions. Axel's akles brushed the edge of the ledge, far below them all of Midgar sprawled out in a sea of glittering silver and gold lights. Somewhere along the outskirts a reactor spewed glowing Lifetsream into the sky and Axel closed his eyes, ready to heed the cry of the planet. This was a journey to fly solo.

"I'm a dead man, Roxas." He stroked the soft blonde plume. "On a fast track to hell. They don't want you, you can live."

Roxas leaned into Axel gently, kissing blood from his knuckles. He laced their fingers and kissed the redhead again stepping closer to the edge. He was ready to take this journey, too.

"Take me under.."

Again he was falling but not like ever before. Here in Axel's arms, plummeting towards the cityscape. Screams and shots sounded around them but it meant nothing. Gravity pulled them hungrily down to their deaths and they defied it, falling in their own time. Wrapped in each other's arms they threw their heads back and laughed in spite of themselves. This was the ultimate trip, the ultimate rush. Teetering so close on the edge of life and death, their delicate lives hanging in the balance flying into their inevitable demise. This wasn't falling. This was flying.

Leaning in they shared one last deep, passionate kiss before closing their eyes and succumbing to the sanctuary eternal sleep. They were free...

**~+Epilogue+~**

It was cold out today, the autumn breezes dancing at his ankles. He strode slowly through the rows of headstones knowing the exact path to take. There was no need to hurry. He knew his way and it wasn't like they had anywhere else to go. Reno reached into his partner's pocket and withdrew the pack of cigarettes, soothing his nerves with sweet nicotine. It had been nearly a week since Axel and Roxas had commited suicide but it was like nothign had changed. The world continued on as it always did without a care they ever existed. Was that just the fate of a nobody? No, the Turk mused, that was the ultimate truth. The planet would continue on like you were never a part of it. Never mourn you.. never miss you. Only those who were left behind could percieve such things.

Reno tucked himself closer to Rude as they came to the cherry tree where the two headstones stood together. Side by side even in death. yet that was what puzzled the younger Turk most. What was it that made Roxas justify throwing himself to his death? Xemnas didn't want him. He could have lived on. Was it love? No, probably not. They hadn't known each other too long there's no way he could have honestly fallen for Axel in that short of time. Perhaps it was desperation. A desire to escape the pain and suffering he'd known as well. When Axel died he would have losst everything, he had nothing left to really live for. So it wasn't love. It was self-pity. Heh, Reno shook his head. Stupid kid..

"Do you miss them, Reno?" Rude gently rubbed his shoulders as the redhead knelt to touch the gravestones. As much as they'd fought Axel and Reno had truly been best friends.

"Yeah, I ain't gonna lie." he stood back up. "Rude.. what do you think Roxas killed himself for? Love? Pity?" Rude was silent a long time, watching the two graves quietly as he pondered. He finally shook his bald head, drawing Reno against him.

"I think... it was friendship. He didn't want Axel to be alone.. he didn't want to be alone. Axel took him in after everyone else he ever cared for had abandoned him. He didn't want to be alone anymore and he didn't want Axel to be alone either." He pet the soft red locks tickling his neck. "That's what I think."

Reno nodded. "That sounds good." He smiled at the stones, leaning down to place a kiss to both. "Rest in peace guys... C'mon, Rude."

The two rose and headed for the exit of the cemetary. Wrapped in each other's arms beneath the autumn leaves two souls, finally having found their way, closed their eyes and fell into blissful respite.

Never forgotten

Never alone


End file.
